I remember hating High School. I went to a small school. When my sister got her license "Woo Hoo" no more riding the bus, we got to take her car to school. It was a red VW, I loved that car and remembered thinking wow this is going to be so cool! Little did I know I would end up resenting it and her........
I had to ride with her every morning. At first I thought this is going to be great but I quickly changed my mind. You see, my sister would stop and pick up a friend every morning and then drive around smoking! I'm not talking about cigarettes either. I would beg her to let me out at the top of the hill and I would walk down to the school. But no, everyone would know that she was still out driving around.....ugh!! So I would wreak of it when I walked into school, and I wasn't even smoking it, but that didn't matter. I was guilty anyway. I started receiving stares from teachers and students alike. I will never ever forget how that felt.
That is one of the things I think that helped put me in the loner state of mind. I didn't run with the "pot heads", I didn't run with the "brains" group either, I didn't run with the "athletes", I just kept to myself a lot and floated between some of the new friends I had made, pompom girls and some old friends that liked to party (drink). I wasn't completely innocent I did drink some but never drugs.
I wish I had had the courage to "OUT" her back then, drugs and alochol seemed to consume her, maybe SHE WOULD STILL BE HERE and OUR LIVES would have turned out differently. I miss her everyday.......I can't help being angry, at her, at myself, at the teaching staff.....I just don't understand it "WHY"????
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